Medication, that is.
Updating on the struggles of my communications course, it ended up just being too much of a trigger for me at this point and as a result I dropped it. I was really trying to push myself, but the culture activity sort of sent me off on a whirlwind of emotional strife. I had a bit of a breakdown, spent nearly two weeks straight at peak anxiety levels, couldn’t talk myself into even going back to the class at all. Lots of tears, self-hate, and a bit of seriously negative wishing for an end to all this bullshit sent me off to my doctor.
So, now I’m temporarily giving a go to some generic Zoloft. We’ll see how that goes since I really hate feeling like I have to be medicated to be productively functional — but I just couldn’t justify continuing to feel all the feelings I was feeling! So far so good, I guess.