Can’t take it

Seriously. I just can’t. I’m so tired. Why does everything have to be so f*cking hard? Why do I always feel so alone? Like I’ve got no one ever to lean on or talk to or depend on? I’m just so tired of this horseshit life. I’m angry and hurt and sad and so many things all at once. In two weeks it will have been 27 years since my mom passed away. I’m gonna be brutally honest about the fact that I’m still sad and angry about that even! Like, why the hell did she have to leave us

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Breaking Point — Is this it?

Over qualified. Under qualified. Kiss my ass. I need a job! Job satisfaction? Who cares! A paycheck in and of itself is more than enough satisfaction at this point! Ridiculous! Officially nine months since I began looking for a new job (or any source of income at all, really) and still flailing. No job = No home. My divorce was final in December. I totaled my minivan in the same month. Used the bulk of my savings to buy a new car (well, not a brand new car, obviously!). Watching my fabulous credit score that I busted my ass to

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Let the Chips Fall?

I like control. I like security. I like knowing what to do and how to do it, when to do it, and why I’m doing it. I like order. I like lists and schedules, organization, and reasonable plans of action. I don’t like having absolutely no control — or the feeling of having absolutely no control. I don’t like not knowing what I’m doing or how to do what I feel like I need to be doing. I don’t like waiting. I don’t like this whole “let the chips fall where they may” thing that seems to be occurring in

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