Kaleidoscope Brain

I’ve began prepping for this year’s NaNoWriMo. Despite my social anxiety, I’d really like to make an effort to immerse myself in a supportive writing environment, which means, I could use some writing buddies. I joined forever ago (2012) and haven’t kept up. But I’m committed this year, really I am.

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To Medicate Again, or Not

I’ve medicated in the past. Celexa, Lexapro, Wellbutrin, and Zoloft, as I recall. But not… Paxil (Paroxetine). I don’t really know how I feel about it. Yesterday was another follow-up with my new-this-year family doctor. Aside from confirming the addition of hypothyroid to my list of diagnoses she asked whether I would willingly try Paxil. This was after a torturously long, thoughtful pause (we’re talking a whole five minutes here!) and having disclosed the list of SSRIs tried in the past. Well, and combinations of SSRIs, too. It was clear she was racking her brain for something to suggest that

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Social Anxiety in the Internet-Sphere

It might seem like it’s easier to interact with others online, but social media can provide new stressors and a deeper sense of isolation. Source: For People With Social Anxiety, The Internet Is A Blessing And A Curse | HuffPost I’ve mentioned before that I read articles for a living. It’s not the best living, but it jives fairly well with my social anxiety, generalized anxiety, depression and other diagnoses that impact my ability to successfully work outside the home, and it’s better than making no money at all. Anyway, in the course of that I came upon the article

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Losing the war

It’s getting harder to wake up each morning, yet I continue to do so for my children more than anything. They’re almost all grown. Nowhere near ready to tackle life entirely on their own quite yet. I’m growing more hopeless and tired of struggling all the time. Every day. Every single day. Why is it so hard to get by in this world? Is it because I just can’t conform to the expectations of this ridiculous society in which we exist? Is it because I am ultimately unworthy? I can’t really seem to figure it out. I’ve continued to push

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Not Alone.

I guess I write an awful lot about issues I’m having that are related to my anxiety — it appears to be the biggest tag in my cloud. I don’t tend to dig very deep into it though, because… well, I’m anxious about over-sharing and opening myself up to additional judgement, since, as anyone with social anxiety is well aware, we are pretty freaking ruthless in terms of passing judgement on ourselves. Yesterday I was surprised to find an email via the contact form on my site from a person I presume was just passing through and took the time

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